True Confessions Friday:: I want to quit.

29 May

I want to quit.  I want to take a signed resignation letter to the desk of whoever gave me my current life and give my two weeks notice.  Then I want to consider my options and sign up for a new life—one with better benefits, cooler digs, and dogs that actually listen to my commands.  Starting today, I am no longer Amy the Blogger; I am now Amy the Supreme Court Justice.  If only quitting life was that easy…

I am tired of being in this place in my life.  I hate that nice girls finish last, that the good guys don’t always win, and that some stories don’t have happy endings.   Yet I want to believe that a nice girl can do well for herself, that the good guys will win [the heart of the nice girl], and that my story will have a tremendously happy ending.  However, nothing seems to change, except me, but not my circumstances.  For instance, where’s my cushy writing job?  Is it hiding in a land far away with Mr. Right and my diamond engagement ring?  I’m trudging on learning better ways to cope with my anxiety and depression, the world outside spins merrily on.  And I’m still here.

Sometimes here is a really hard place.

Quitting is the easy thing to do.  I can simply throw my hands in the air, announce “I quit” to the world, and give up.   I know I have a choice to live life, even when it hurts, or to quit.  Maybe I could sit under a broom tree like Elijah and wait to die.  I mean, if anyone ever tried to quit life, Elijah did in 1 Kings.  He basically says, “Look, God, all Your prophets are dead.  I’m the only one left and I’ll be dead soon, too.  I’m gonna sit under this tree and welcome death.” Of course, God had other plans for Elijah and cared for Elijah during his “two weeks notice”  (Read more at 1 Kings 17).

I won’t quit life just yet, even though I’m tempted. Besides, I don’t think there are any broom trees growing here in Eastern Pennsylvania anyway.

Advertisements

No Responses to “True Confessions Friday:: I want to quit.”

  1. mezzamorph May 29, 2009 at 8:57 AM #

    I”m right there with you Amy. There are plenty of things that steal our happiness, but nothing can steal our Joy. Wish I had connections to get you that cushy writing job. Well, maybe not exactly cushy. At least profitable.

  2. Gman May 29, 2009 at 9:47 AM #

    I’m glad you won’t quit. Keep up the blogging. I usually try to read what you write. I have it in my google reader.

    Know you are valuable to God and loved.

  3. MOM May 29, 2009 at 9:57 AM #

    Hey Amy! I know how you feel, but if I had given my two weks notice in my mid-twenties, YOU would not be here at all? Besides you are greatly loved and cherished and God continues to work out His plan for you. If you give up, who will go garage sale shopping with me tomorrow?

  4. taytaysnevets May 29, 2009 at 5:35 PM #

    Hey Amy,
    I stumbled upon your website a few weeks ago and I have been incredibly encouraged and blessed by the things you write. You have a gift for writing that speaks to my heart, even if life doesn’t seem great;you are great, Christ is great. Thanks for making a difference in my life and in others and thanks for not giving up on what you love.

    • Amy May 29, 2009 at 7:05 PM #

      Thanks for the comments, everyone! I really appreciate them.

      Of course, you guys know I’m not looking for accolades. I’m just trying to be honest about how I feel and hoping that others can relate–something all writers try to do. 🙂

  5. Simone June 14, 2009 at 6:22 PM #

    After getting over the shock of my actually typing in I WANT TO QUIT LIFE into the search box, I was pleasently surprised to find that I’m not the only one, and even more surprised to find such an encouraging article !! Thanks and GOOD LUCK!!

    • Amy June 14, 2009 at 9:00 PM #

      Simone, that’s right! Don’t give life two weeks notice! You can do it…no matter how impossible it seems.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: