Ryan Seacrest Isn’t Gay?!

“American Idol” host Ryan Seacrest looking very manly, and not metro.

All these years, I thought the poster boy for metrosexuals everywhere was also a homosexual. Although Ryan Seacrest has dulled down his wardrobe for Season 7 of “American Idol”, I thought it was merely to look “less gay”. I know that sounds so terribly stereotypical because people don’t always “look gay”, but there are certain behaviors that tend to be attributed to certain groups of people. Plus, AI judge  Simon Cowell wickedly fuels rumors about Ryan’s sexuality with his biting banter with the host on the show each week.

Anyway, the gossip rag TMZ.com is reporting that Ryan’s out…with a girl (video evidence).

Ryan’s gal pal happens to be Sophie Monk who was engaged to some dude named Benji (does he know there are several movies about a dog with the same name?) who’s now dating Paris Hilton.  Some are calling the whole “date” a scam.  I don’t know about that–why try so hard to hide it?  It’s very “in” to be out and proud.  I just happened to think he was gay, but I reckon he’s not.

And now that I know the truth, I can’t even date him because it’s already got a gal.  And Simon’s engaged!  Blast it all!

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